BogusBoxes.com - Fake Products. Great Gift Boxes.

Put Your "Crummy" Gifts in Our Boxes

If the product existed: $499 - but for just the box:

$7.99 plus $5 S&H

Box is 12 x 9 x 4 inches

Need to order more for office gifting or party favors?

Additional boxes shipped at a discount.
Over 10 boxes, call us for a quote.

Toll Free: 855-4-BOGUS-2

(855-426-4872)

Click below to see more of the gag gift box.

Speak your mind, or simply do your usual blah, blah, blah here:

BogusBox Blog

Say that 3 times fast.

How It's Supposed to Work

Basically, you press the suction cups of the ExhausTXT unit (not included) onto the inside of your rear car window. By inserting 4 AA batteries (also not included), the unit will fire up. You can also purchase an optional cord that plugs into your cigarette lighter for longer hauls. (Please don't make us continue repeating that there's absolutely nothing included in the box.)

Next you download our free app (NI = Not Included). Once our fictitious text app is downloaded, you can use your smartphone to send text messages to the ExhausTXT unit. Cool - right? But wait, that's not all we made up. You can save your top 10 favorite text messages - WTF or BFF or LOL or OMG or whatever - and supposedly, they will appear on your mobile phone's screen for you to send with a single touch. Hopefully, when someone finally steals this product idea, they'll actually go ahead and include some smart time savers like this totally bogus "favorites" list.

Of course, our fictional product comes with an upgrade for symbols and unlimited "favorite text message" storage. You can get a bunch of symbols like a simple "thumbs down" to the ubiquitous driving signal - "the middle finger." We think that the symbols will ultimately be the biggest seller - especially as the pictures get more suggestive. But we're not going there.

Languages

What we didn't figure out is whether these text messages cross the language barrier. For instance, what's Spanish for WTF? Or what's Chinese for BFF? Even Canadian gave us a headache, and our sample poll of drunken friends couldn't really help us. It'll be in the next release.

Texting Guide for Seniors

ATD:

At The Doctor's

BFF:

Best Friend Fainted

BTW:

Bring The Wheelchair

BYOT:

Bring Your Own Teeth

CBM:

Covered By Medicare

CGU:

Can't get up

CUATSC:

See You At The Senior Center

DWI:

Driving While Incontinent

FWB:

Friend With Beta Blockers

FWIW:

Forgot Where I Was

FYI:

Found Your Insulin

GGPBL:

Gotta Go Pacemaker Battery Low!

GHA:

Got Heartburn Again

HGBM:

Had Good Bowel Movement

IMHO:

Is My Hearing-Aid On?

LMDO:

Laughing My Dentures Out

LOL:

Living On Lipitor

LWO:

Lawrence Welk's On

OMMR:

On My Massage Recliner

OMSG:

Oh My! Sorry Gas.

ROFL - CGU:

Rolling On The Floor Laughing - Can't Get Up!

TTYL:

Talk To You Louder

WAITT:

Who Am I Talking To?

WTFA:

Wet The Furniture Again

WTP:

Where's The Prunes?

WWNO:

Walker Wheels Need Oil

GGLKI:

(Gotta Go Laxative Kicking In)

Testimonials

"Why don't you simply make the damn product? It's actually useful." -- Mike P., Boston, MA

"As always, you marketing types take the easy way out by simply designing the box. What's the technology for the smooth screen graphics? You know that has to be LEDs, and LEDs are loaded with dots." -- Joe M., Weston Hills, CA

"Who's the foul-mouthed old lady who claims to have flashed WTF to old lady O'Reilly? I'm old lady O'Reilly and my son Patty the Torch is looking for her." Mrs. O'Reilly, Boston, MA

We think the dog testimonial for our PetCAM360 tops this one. This is what happens when one of your top designers starts dating. We have to hire his girlfriend (and then she has a girlfriend). This is the edited (down) version. >>

Upcoming Products

Of course we have upcoming products. Do you think we're going to tell you about them ahead of time so that you can steal them? ROTFLMAO. And 'no', we don't provide the definition for ROTFLMAO on the box because it's way too long to fit on our fictitious ExhausTXT unit.

Summary, Shipping, and Stuff Like That

Okay. That pretty much covers it. So how about parting with the lousy $7.99 we're asking for the box? And don't complain about shipping costs. Call the Post Office and ask them why it costs almost as much as the damn gag gift box. At least we're a lot less than our competitors, whose prank gift boxes suck. That pricing advantage should last as long as the owner's cousins can't find work at shipping companies that pay minimum wage. They haven't figured out that addressing, packing and shipping a box for 10 cents each, only pays them about 50 cents an hour. We told them that they should be able to do 300 boxes an hour and they'll make $30/hour. They haven't stopped thanking us. ID10Ts.

Talented Design Staff Working on This Box

Watch one of our top designers in action as our first gag gift box comes to life before you eyes.

If only we didn't have to do drug testing. We would have had our next box by now.

Oh well. At least we have figured out how to retain earnings for these emergencies.

Our Chief Financial Officer wanted us to remind you of this: If you'd like to buy both boxes, which is what we are secretly hoping, go back to our home page and order the combo pack. We significantly discount shipping on the second box, because the Post Office scales aren't that accurate, and we're making a killing on the handling with the owner's cousins.